Tuesday, 20 January 2009

• THINGS I HAVE LEARNED FROM LIVING IN TEXAS

  
  *Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air.

  *There are 5,000 types of snakes on earth and 4,998 live in Texas .

  *There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in Texas , plus a couple no one's seen before.

  *If it grows, it sticks; if it crawls, it bites.

  *Onced and Twiced are words.

  *It is not a shopping cart; it is a buggy.

  *People actually grow and eat okra.

  *'Fixinto' is one word.

  *There is no such thing as 'lunch.' There is only dinner and then supper.

  *Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar!

  *Backwards and forwards means 'I know everything about you.'

  *D'Jeet is actually a phrase meaning 'Did you eat?'

  *You don't have to wear a watch because it doesn't matter what time it is. You work until you're done or it's too dark to see.

  *You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH them.

  *You measure distance in minutes.

  *You'll probably have to switch from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day.

  *'Fix' is a verb. Example: 'I'm fixing to go to the store.'

  *You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.

  *You carry jumper cables in your car . . . for your OWN car.

  *There are only four spices: salt, pepper, Tabasco and ketchup.

  *The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local gossip and sports.

  *The first day of deer season is a national holiday.

  *100 degrees Fahrenheit is 'a little warm.'

  *We have four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer, still Summer and Christmas.

  *Going to Wal-mart is a favorite past time known as 'goin' Wal-martin' or off to 'Wally World.'

  *A cool snap (below 70 degrees) is good pinto-bean weather.

  *A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola or pop. . . . it's a Coke, regardless of brand or flavor. Example: 'What kinda coke you want?'

  *Fried catfish is the other white meat.

  *We don't need no stinking driver's ed . . . if our mama says we can drive, we can drive.  

  EVERYONE can't be from Texas; it takes talent.

  You might say it's an art form or a gift from God!

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